Blob Sculpin ~ the Blobfish

Chances are in your life you’ll never see a blobfish (and you’re not missing out on much). Why? Because they are only found at depths of around 800 meters off the coast of Australia and Tasmania. Life this deep for most other fish is impossible, as the depth pressure would literally cause the other fish’s gas bladders to completely give up. Gas bladders are the reason fish can float. The reason the blobfish can survive such depths is also what gives it its “unique” (a.k.a. ugly) look. The blobfish doesn’t have a gas bladder, instead it’s almost entirely compromised of a gelatinous substance that keeps the blobfish from sinking. Why? Because the density of the jelly stuff is less then the density of the water surrounding the blobfish.

"Yes, I am possibly the ugliest thing on earth. No, I do not appreciate your judgement."

The Blobfish is really just a large mass of gel- kind of like looking at jelly but larger and with eyes and a nose and a mouth and an expression that is kind of like a scowl or frown. The fish averages around two feet long. The blobfish is just as lazy as it looks and sounds-it basically never uses any energy, not even to catch prey! All it does for food is gobble up whatever just happens to be floating by. They should seriously think about their carb intake! Blobfish mainly eat invertebrates like crabs, sea urchins, mollusks and sea pens.

Female blobfish lay thousands of eggs at once and, unlike a lot of fish, the blobfish will actually stay with her eggs, floating just above, or in some cases literally sitting on the eggs. It’s not uncommon to find groups of blobfish nesting together with one female’s eggs sometimes right next to another females. Its not known whether this behavior is strategic of whether it is just a result of their ‘lazy’ nature- I’m rooting for the ‘lazy’! Blobfish nearly always make the top ten in lists for the weirdest and ugliest creatures on this entire earth!

Now meet Bob and Bobette

G'day

Oh hello!

 We're going to have an interview with these two!

Me: Okay, so everyone meet Bob. Bob has actually had a role in the movie Men In Black 3- playing himself!

Bob: G’day everyone!

Me: and this is Bobette

Bobette: Hi ‘yall!

Me: so Bob, what's been a movie star like?

Bob: I wouldn't exactly call myself a star... A rising star would be more fitting

Me: Yep- you do a lot if rising don’t you? I've heard that to get to the surface of the sea, you have to rise over 800 meters! Right from the bottom! That's impressive!

Bob: I know- it's an underappreciated skill. Still, I think I’m going to put it on my resume.

Me: huh. So anyway... Bobette, are you and Bob considering any more kids?

Bobette: are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!?!? Do you know how long I had to sit on those damn eggs? And there were tens of thousands of eggs! THOUSANDS! And I had to listen to all those gossipy blobfish next to me, saying their eggs were bigger and prettier and they had laid more and I just can’t take it!!!

Me: hey, did you know that some baby animals eat their parents?

Bobette: holy cowfish! I ain't never gonna fertilize another damn egg again!

Me: Bob, if it isn't too personal... How do you and your lady, you know, 'ice the cupcake'?

Bobette: you mean how do we have sex?

Me: Bobette! Children could be reading this!

Bob: kids, sex is a natural and beautiful thing-

Me: Look, forget I asked!

Bob: excuse me? I believe I hadn't finished! Sex is a natural and beautiful thing- for humans. All me and the Mrs. do is crowd together with a bunch of other blobfish and Bobette lays her eggs, and I release the fertilizing sperm and then I float away. And that's just damn ugly!

Me: wow... That's kind of sad.

Bob: look, is this over? I want to go back to swimming the net for auditions for blobfish parts in movies

Me: don’t you mean 'surfing' the net?

Bob: do I look like I can surf???

Me: to be honest, you don't look like you can swim.

Bob: this interview is over! And FYI- I don’t need to swim! All I ever have to do is float on one spot and suck anything that floats past into my mouth. I’m livin’ the dream baby!

Me: I don’t know Bob, maybe that’s reason you’re both so fat! All you do is spend all your time at the bottom of the ocean. Maybe if you actually swam around a bit, you could become more then literally just a lump of fat. I mean, you don’t even have muscles! ‘Coz you’re like a lump of jelly! Um……… Bob??? Bobette??? Come back!

Well, this interview is clearly over and so is this post! Our next Crazy Creature is going to be the Star Nosed Mole. Here’s a sneak peek at his nose:

Seriously. That’s his nose!

Love you all!

Chloe :)

P.S. Bob begged me to post a link to the trailer for the Men In Black 3 movie he appears in! I highly advise the movie! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyaFEBI_L24